We hear science has come up with yet another way to extend natural fertility.
Instead of freezing eggs alone - whether fertilized or no - why not remove a woman's ovary and freeze the organ whole?
Then when the woman seeks to start her family, thaw and replace, and hey presto, a fully functioning reproductive system.
The world seems much askew - so many women suffering the burden of over-abundant fruitfulness, others weeping for their cold emptiness, and those few, those very few who seek to buy themselves a perfect life.
We wonder if perfection is a construct of the mind, forever out of reach.
No matter what the striving for the next tomorrow.
Tuesday, 30 June 2009
Saturday, 27 June 2009
Dancing in the Dark
We are one loved up crowd right now.
You might have noticed our foot stomping, flag waving frenzy as we collected our fluffiest clouds and gathered round to look down as The Boss played Worthy Farm.
Most years we take more pleasure in trying to wash away the revellers and swamp their feeble tents in mud - but this year we had our most serious respects to pay.
And it was worth every bribe we laid out to keep the rainclouds away - the show was just amazing. The energy coming up from that crowd, from the band, from Mr S. himself, will keep our ambrosia fields powered for at least the next six months.
Springsteen gave the performance everything - frequently coming down from the stage and leaning across right into the crowd; letting the fans actually Touch His Guitar; practically body-surfing at one point.
There is just nothing like live music - even if you can't physically be one of the crowd, just watching it happen can fill you with joy and send you flying like a kite.
Though perhaps the music shouldn't take quite all the credit for that sensation.
You might have noticed our foot stomping, flag waving frenzy as we collected our fluffiest clouds and gathered round to look down as The Boss played Worthy Farm.
Most years we take more pleasure in trying to wash away the revellers and swamp their feeble tents in mud - but this year we had our most serious respects to pay.
And it was worth every bribe we laid out to keep the rainclouds away - the show was just amazing. The energy coming up from that crowd, from the band, from Mr S. himself, will keep our ambrosia fields powered for at least the next six months.
Springsteen gave the performance everything - frequently coming down from the stage and leaning across right into the crowd; letting the fans actually Touch His Guitar; practically body-surfing at one point.
There is just nothing like live music - even if you can't physically be one of the crowd, just watching it happen can fill you with joy and send you flying like a kite.
Though perhaps the music shouldn't take quite all the credit for that sensation.
Thursday, 25 June 2009
Curtains for our Nursery?
We don't have many positive thoughts about your scientists, but it seems they may have spotted the miniscule signal that could lead them to discover the future of the earth.
We felt concern for many years about earth's prospects once the fledgling humankind had pillaged and destroyed its way through natural resources laid down in earlier millennia.
And so set up a scheme to generate a new life process we could use to re-seed earth once human life is gone. Giving of course much thought to the siting of this seedbed to ensure it safe from human knowledge.
Imagine then our sorrow to see the prospect of our project brought to nought.
We gird ourselves to start anew tomorrow.
We felt concern for many years about earth's prospects once the fledgling humankind had pillaged and destroyed its way through natural resources laid down in earlier millennia.
And so set up a scheme to generate a new life process we could use to re-seed earth once human life is gone. Giving of course much thought to the siting of this seedbed to ensure it safe from human knowledge.
Imagine then our sorrow to see the prospect of our project brought to nought.
We gird ourselves to start anew tomorrow.
Wednesday, 24 June 2009
High Steaks?
We are in despair to hear that your scientists aim to develop a cow that produces less methane during its digestive process.
Such a project would seem laughable were it not for the reasoning behind the scheme.
Scientists have apparently calculated that the methane produced by the world's cows is responsible for more global warming than the profligate use of resources by humankind on its reckless voyage to destruction.
This discovery might be seen as yet another warning to humankind to reduce the number of animals reared to satisfy its desire for meat. But how much easier for your leaders if what must change is not the habits of the human population, but the genetic pattern of the bovine population.
When will you start to take responsibility for the results of your own behaviour?
Sadly it seems unlikely to be tomorrow.
Such a project would seem laughable were it not for the reasoning behind the scheme.
Scientists have apparently calculated that the methane produced by the world's cows is responsible for more global warming than the profligate use of resources by humankind on its reckless voyage to destruction.
This discovery might be seen as yet another warning to humankind to reduce the number of animals reared to satisfy its desire for meat. But how much easier for your leaders if what must change is not the habits of the human population, but the genetic pattern of the bovine population.
When will you start to take responsibility for the results of your own behaviour?
Sadly it seems unlikely to be tomorrow.
Monday, 22 June 2009
freedom to worship? or human rights?
The president of France has taken a bold step.
He suggests that the burka should be banned in France as it subverts the rights of women to live as free citizens.
In light of the usual response of the followers of islam to such supposed heresy this makes M. Sarkozy quite a brave man.
Vive la France!
He suggests that the burka should be banned in France as it subverts the rights of women to live as free citizens.
In light of the usual response of the followers of islam to such supposed heresy this makes M. Sarkozy quite a brave man.
Vive la France!
Sunday, 21 June 2009
summer solstice
We thank you for your energy this morning.
What a wonderful sight to see so many thousands come to celebrate at the old stones.
We smile to think what the priests would have felt to see you freely within their sacred space, and hope their shades are not too much distressed.
For ourselves, we give you thanks once more for the power of your thoughts and prayers.
Until tomorrow.
What a wonderful sight to see so many thousands come to celebrate at the old stones.
We smile to think what the priests would have felt to see you freely within their sacred space, and hope their shades are not too much distressed.
For ourselves, we give you thanks once more for the power of your thoughts and prayers.
Until tomorrow.
Friday, 19 June 2009
star gazing goes worldwide
It's now almost half way through the year you mortals have dedicated to celebrating the art and science of Astronomy.
Some of us were a little apprehensive earlier lest our privacy might be invaded, but so far the long-distance lenses have been successfully deflected.
Others among us debated whether such international effort on your part might result in your discovering some of the other inhabited planets. And with them of course, those of our cousins in residence.
It would be a pleasure for us to re-establish contact after such long passage of time.
We will hope for tomorrow.
Some of us were a little apprehensive earlier lest our privacy might be invaded, but so far the long-distance lenses have been successfully deflected.
Others among us debated whether such international effort on your part might result in your discovering some of the other inhabited planets. And with them of course, those of our cousins in residence.
It would be a pleasure for us to re-establish contact after such long passage of time.
We will hope for tomorrow.
Wednesday, 17 June 2009
too warm for woolly mammoths
We note your scientists are acknowleding that they don't always come up with the right answers, despite all their gadgets.
A few years back their new toy was telling them that woolly mammoths left Northwest Europe some 21,000 years ago. But now with their super state-of-the-art-upgraded toy, they report mammoths were in the area for another 7,000 years after all.
With error rates at that level it seems more unwise than ever for you to allow your scientists such freedom to work in nuclear engineering, whether it be for bombs or for power plants.
Shall we hope for error free science tomorrow?
A few years back their new toy was telling them that woolly mammoths left Northwest Europe some 21,000 years ago. But now with their super state-of-the-art-upgraded toy, they report mammoths were in the area for another 7,000 years after all.
With error rates at that level it seems more unwise than ever for you to allow your scientists such freedom to work in nuclear engineering, whether it be for bombs or for power plants.
Shall we hope for error free science tomorrow?
Tuesday, 16 June 2009
let them eat cake
It pleases us to see our representatives among you praised for their work.
More often our ecologists and conservationists meet hostility or laughter for their efforts, but today seems all celebration of their success in bringing the Large Blue back to the south of England.
This butterfly is easily known when seen, being indeed quite large, and very blue, and was first thought disappearing to the pins of collectors. Through skilful use of the battenburg cake our people showed it was in truth the local ant that disappeared - Myrmica sabuleti, whose nests play vital host to the caterpillars of the Large Blue.
The chequered battenburg was perforce the cake of choice in this endeavour, the regular preference of all those taking tea among us. Though whether the ants enjoyed the marzipan has not yet been revealed.
Maybe that will be the subject of a paper for tomorrow.
More often our ecologists and conservationists meet hostility or laughter for their efforts, but today seems all celebration of their success in bringing the Large Blue back to the south of England.
This butterfly is easily known when seen, being indeed quite large, and very blue, and was first thought disappearing to the pins of collectors. Through skilful use of the battenburg cake our people showed it was in truth the local ant that disappeared - Myrmica sabuleti, whose nests play vital host to the caterpillars of the Large Blue.
The chequered battenburg was perforce the cake of choice in this endeavour, the regular preference of all those taking tea among us. Though whether the ants enjoyed the marzipan has not yet been revealed.
Maybe that will be the subject of a paper for tomorrow.
Monday, 15 June 2009
If Duckworth & Lewis Didn't Exist -
would the gods have had to invent them?
Once upon a time, long, long ago, there was the stately game of five day test cricket, and teams would spend three months travelling to play an international series of five or six such games.
Back at home there were regular three day matches as a form of rehearsal, and that was it.
And then people began to think their lives were too busy to take their leisure pursuits so slowly, and the game of fifty overs that could be played in a single day was introduced.
Nwdys v crse ppl r 2 bsy 4 sch wste v thr tme + hv nvntd twnty20 crkt. + wt wthr is gud bcos thn u cn jst ply twnty10 or lss nd sve all tht tme.
Of course if the match this evening had ended a different way, this post might have had quite a different slant!
Once upon a time, long, long ago, there was the stately game of five day test cricket, and teams would spend three months travelling to play an international series of five or six such games.
Back at home there were regular three day matches as a form of rehearsal, and that was it.
And then people began to think their lives were too busy to take their leisure pursuits so slowly, and the game of fifty overs that could be played in a single day was introduced.
Nwdys v crse ppl r 2 bsy 4 sch wste v thr tme + hv nvntd twnty20 crkt. + wt wthr is gud bcos thn u cn jst ply twnty10 or lss nd sve all tht tme.
Of course if the match this evening had ended a different way, this post might have had quite a different slant!
Sunday, 14 June 2009
Nancy Who?
We note with interest that the current presidential nominee for appointment to the Supreme Court has added herself to the list of high-achieving women who cite as one of their role models the (fictional) girl detective Nancy Drew.
More proof perhaps that the pen is indeed mightier than the sword.
More proof perhaps that the pen is indeed mightier than the sword.
Saturday, 13 June 2009
Theraphosidae Spin Out.
We see your scientists are looking to the natural world again for assistance with their work.
The silk of the humble spider having been judged and found wanting, the spotlight turns to their larger and hairier cousins the tarantulas, whose silk is significantly stronger.
The helpless scientists can concoct the appropriate chemical mix for the manufacture of the silk, but apparently still need to discover from the tarantula how to spin the perfect thread.
It amuses us that you still regard yourselves the peak of creation, despite such reminders that you know less than those you count the humblest of earth's creatures.
We hope you start to see the truth some not too far off tomorrow.
The silk of the humble spider having been judged and found wanting, the spotlight turns to their larger and hairier cousins the tarantulas, whose silk is significantly stronger.
The helpless scientists can concoct the appropriate chemical mix for the manufacture of the silk, but apparently still need to discover from the tarantula how to spin the perfect thread.
It amuses us that you still regard yourselves the peak of creation, despite such reminders that you know less than those you count the humblest of earth's creatures.
We hope you start to see the truth some not too far off tomorrow.
Friday, 12 June 2009
Hollywood, Cannes - and Bradford?
We see that the worthy namer of Heritage Sites throughout the world has decided it was time for a laugh.
They weren't serious were they? Bradford may be a fine upstanding Yorkshire town, with a long history in the woollen industry and a nice museum. But these days the city is surely better known as the home of the race riots rather than the film industry.
Currently, visitors to the city are able enjoy the spectacle of a large area of wasteland conveniently situated moments from the town hall. Since the developers made their excuses and left over a year ago this area has remained fenced off to prevent Bradfordians making use of their land.
Bradford does have one saving grace however, one solitary diamond in the dung heap - for the next few days (until 18 June) you can still catch Star Trek the movie at the huge IMAX cinema screen.
And if that isn't worth the accolade of film heritage site, I don't know what is.
They weren't serious were they? Bradford may be a fine upstanding Yorkshire town, with a long history in the woollen industry and a nice museum. But these days the city is surely better known as the home of the race riots rather than the film industry.
Currently, visitors to the city are able enjoy the spectacle of a large area of wasteland conveniently situated moments from the town hall. Since the developers made their excuses and left over a year ago this area has remained fenced off to prevent Bradfordians making use of their land.
Bradford does have one saving grace however, one solitary diamond in the dung heap - for the next few days (until 18 June) you can still catch Star Trek the movie at the huge IMAX cinema screen.
And if that isn't worth the accolade of film heritage site, I don't know what is.
Wednesday, 10 June 2009
green giant?
News today that China is to set its huge industrial foot upon the Environmental pathway.
Strange to think that only a handful of years ago this was a country with an agrarian economy - seeming to erupt almost overnight into a network of the world's most grossly polluting mines and factories.
The necessary power was raised of course by submerging any inconveniently placed community beneath rising water.
We wonder what will be the cost to the people of this new revolution.
But wish there might yet be a pain-free green tomorrow.
Strange to think that only a handful of years ago this was a country with an agrarian economy - seeming to erupt almost overnight into a network of the world's most grossly polluting mines and factories.
The necessary power was raised of course by submerging any inconveniently placed community beneath rising water.
We wonder what will be the cost to the people of this new revolution.
But wish there might yet be a pain-free green tomorrow.
Tuesday, 9 June 2009
the wild rumpus
We noted an ironic incident in England the other day.
European history acknowledges Greece to be the cradle of democracy, and thus it was that elections were recently held to determine membership of the largely unloved european parliament.
The democratic process resulted in two decidedly undemocratic, unpleasant and generally unsuitable individuals being elected in England, to the sound of much negative publicity.
The following day found one of these individuals subject to an expression of public antipathy, with shouting protestors wielding banners and, in the traditional way, throwing eggs at him.
So much for English reserve - but let us hope at least, that all parties returned home to find their tea still hot.
(with grateful thanks to HG)
European history acknowledges Greece to be the cradle of democracy, and thus it was that elections were recently held to determine membership of the largely unloved european parliament.
The democratic process resulted in two decidedly undemocratic, unpleasant and generally unsuitable individuals being elected in England, to the sound of much negative publicity.
The following day found one of these individuals subject to an expression of public antipathy, with shouting protestors wielding banners and, in the traditional way, throwing eggs at him.
So much for English reserve - but let us hope at least, that all parties returned home to find their tea still hot.
(with grateful thanks to HG)
Monday, 8 June 2009
lazy hazy crazy days
The minor godlet tells us life is good just now.
The class have completed their examinations (in the case of the godlet, without need to apply ink to papyrus at any point) and are spending the long summer afternoons lazing on the grass by the river.
The talk moves occasionally to plans for the vacation, and others speak of jobs in daddy's business, extended trips abroad. Invitations are issued and accepted; the minor godlet agrees to visit with those who ask him, sidestepping obligation to return such hospitality.
At dusk the students move indoors, continue their discussions over glasses of red wine, plates of Italian pasta. Careful not to let loose sleeves drift across candle flame as they reach for the bread.
The nights see them studying the arts of love, sometimes with one partner, sometimes with another.
Indeed we may be led to wonder who is in the Elysian fields and who still earthbound, without begrudging glorious youth these few weeks of pleasure.
The class have completed their examinations (in the case of the godlet, without need to apply ink to papyrus at any point) and are spending the long summer afternoons lazing on the grass by the river.
The talk moves occasionally to plans for the vacation, and others speak of jobs in daddy's business, extended trips abroad. Invitations are issued and accepted; the minor godlet agrees to visit with those who ask him, sidestepping obligation to return such hospitality.
At dusk the students move indoors, continue their discussions over glasses of red wine, plates of Italian pasta. Careful not to let loose sleeves drift across candle flame as they reach for the bread.
The nights see them studying the arts of love, sometimes with one partner, sometimes with another.
Indeed we may be led to wonder who is in the Elysian fields and who still earthbound, without begrudging glorious youth these few weeks of pleasure.
Sunday, 7 June 2009
A v. B
Two countries, two leaders, one beach - two very different stories.
From the USA, a man strong in the knowledge of huge support at home and world acclaim for speeches that may lead the way to peace.
From the UK, a man weakened by local political scandal, looking lost and hopeless.
I wonder what lies ahead for their tomorrows?
From the USA, a man strong in the knowledge of huge support at home and world acclaim for speeches that may lead the way to peace.
From the UK, a man weakened by local political scandal, looking lost and hopeless.
I wonder what lies ahead for their tomorrows?
Saturday, 6 June 2009
Dr Priapus Replies:
Jupiter - King of the Gods? I'm a harder man than you are, take any day of the week (you can ask Diana, or the three Graces - or Narcissus, come to that).
And as for your letter - the less said the better. Have you taken a look around you lately? Seen the hundreds of thousands of good people without jobs at all? Queuing in the streets for handouts?
There's plenty of those people would crawl over hot coals for the chance to walk a few eggshells if it meant being in work.
My advice to you and your non-unionised whitecollar co-workers is to tiptoe over those eggshells; avoid the nasty b*st*rd as much as you can and let the women cry all they want to.
Anything to keep the paychecks coming, until that small service company of yours sinks without trace into the chaotic waters of the credit crisis.
Don't bother me again for a while old chap. I'm feeling rather stiff right now so I'm off to find some company.
And as for your letter - the less said the better. Have you taken a look around you lately? Seen the hundreds of thousands of good people without jobs at all? Queuing in the streets for handouts?
There's plenty of those people would crawl over hot coals for the chance to walk a few eggshells if it meant being in work.
My advice to you and your non-unionised whitecollar co-workers is to tiptoe over those eggshells; avoid the nasty b*st*rd as much as you can and let the women cry all they want to.
Anything to keep the paychecks coming, until that small service company of yours sinks without trace into the chaotic waters of the credit crisis.
Don't bother me again for a while old chap. I'm feeling rather stiff right now so I'm off to find some company.
Friday, 5 June 2009
A stranger writes:
Jupiter isn't able to post at the moment
- as he is suffering from a MASSIVE ATTACK OF SELF PITY caused by feeling that his boss at the office just doesn't understand him.
The rest of this post has been compressed in an effort to minimise stress to any passing reader -
... the nasty lying b*****d who likes to tell us he's the boss reduced one of the women to tears with the sheer uncalled-for contempt of his attitude - and not one of the rest of us dared to face him down about this. ... already spent the week treading on eggshells trying ...
... a small service company, money isn't coming in as it used to ... whitecollar non-unionised workforce ... ng in this atmosphere.
Maybe we should ask advice from Dr Priapus at Slate.
- as he is suffering from a MASSIVE ATTACK OF SELF PITY caused by feeling that his boss at the office just doesn't understand him.
The rest of this post has been compressed in an effort to minimise stress to any passing reader -
... the nasty lying b*****d who likes to tell us he's the boss reduced one of the women to tears with the sheer uncalled-for contempt of his attitude - and not one of the rest of us dared to face him down about this. ... already spent the week treading on eggshells trying ...
... a small service company, money isn't coming in as it used to ... whitecollar non-unionised workforce ... ng in this atmosphere.
Maybe we should ask advice from Dr Priapus at Slate.
Wednesday, 3 June 2009
Tuesday, 2 June 2009
Quiet Please!
We're feeling rather delicate up here today.
Yesterday was a day of unusual festivity among us, and perhaps we drank a little more deeply than was altogether wise from the bottomless flagons of Pan's hospitality.
It seems today that even the tiniest clouds move too swiftly and with too much clattering.
Doubtless all will seem much improved by tomorrow.
We do hope so.
Yesterday was a day of unusual festivity among us, and perhaps we drank a little more deeply than was altogether wise from the bottomless flagons of Pan's hospitality.
It seems today that even the tiniest clouds move too swiftly and with too much clattering.
Doubtless all will seem much improved by tomorrow.
We do hope so.
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